I'm unemployed and need a job. I'm a web developer (I'm good at design but I'm better at code and content) that just finished working for Disney (cmon, Disney has to count for something, right?) and is new to Chicago. I'm really good at what I do. I don't take long lunches and don't make a mess. I know enough to be deferential and follow directions. I smell quite nice most of the time. I've got a winning smile and a sparkling (but not annoyingly so) personality. I like swimming, candlelight dinners, moonlight walks on the beach, and long, meaningful stares into the eyes of my lover. If you pick me to join your company I promise I'll keep the swearing to a minimum and will smile all day long. You don't even need to pay me, I'll work for free if you'll just let me do what I do best! My life misses having a purpose! I'm sick of spending my days in my underpants surfing the web. I'm sick of crying myself to sleep at nights. I am so ready to come to work for YOU! P.S. - I was lying about the 'you not paying me' thing. I'm broke and have rent to pay.